Wednesday, July 19, 2006

I fear....

Another email from a fellow candidate for Sq informed us about the good news about reporting in for training in August. So far, five other girls have been given the good news. Slowly...replies are coming in one by one. We will be separated and will be reporting in on different dates. I fear i will receive the last email, or may just be rejected again. However that is not the only thing i fear.

I fear leaving home now. I dont know why or what happen to my enthusiasm in the first place.??? i fear i may die of spiritual hunger and suffer loneliness as not able to adapt to such a change in environment and maybe pressure... mostly i fear leaving my comfort and close knit of family and friends. What can i do?

Maybe if i receive the reply.... it would not be the reply i have expected....i may be disappointed but moreover i know my family will be there for me. But if i receive the expected answer.... i may not be brave enough to go with it... feeling such frailty in me... i simply can't explain how i feel now.

I fear, if the reply comes today, i may not have enough time to spend acknowledgin everyone close. I fear coz i dont know how to acknowledge some even now. I fear i may never find such friendship, relationship or close bond as with so many i have now. The fear of starting anew and being not strong now is intimidating and discouraging.

I try to share my concerns with my fellow girlfrens who are going... but i guess i get no answers that will subside my fears. So, i'm turning to the most High, expecting an answer, hope and assurance that i'll be fine wherever He puts me.

You... on the other hand... need be strong and courageous, unlike me... and press on for the things u dream of. And Maybe u can encourage me someday as we all do with our little experiences. Drop me a line....whenever u feel like it.


Saturday, July 15, 2006

Kasih Allah melalui Yesus Kristus

ROMA 8 : 35

Apakah yand dapat menghalang Kristus mengasihi kita? Tiada sesuatu pun dapat menghalang Kristus mengasihi kita : baik kesusahan, kesukaran, penganiayaan,kelaparan,kemiskinan, bahaya mahupun kematian. beautiful.....beautiful is this song of You~ beautiful.....beautiful is this song for You~
In all in all for You...

So beautiful are You.

Come Lord we pray that the skies open wide
Lord we worship you from afar
As you listen to... our voices sing high above...take pleasure...take pleasure
Like streams of the river flow... the quiet serenity of You
I rest in peace my doubts of You
As i warmth in Your presence
Like the warmth of the sun
I calm myself down in You

So Beautiful are You.
So Beautiful are You.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Sudden Death

If suddenly u were caught in an accident, What Would You Do? You are pinned down under the wheels, you can't move and its raining! Flash backs of your life and the recent argument you had with your mother runs through your head! You know u are going to die....But wait! "I can't DIE!"

Within that very few seconds, you saw what looks like a Endless Pit of Fire and the scorching heat, the foul SMELL of burnt and rotting flesh! Screamings of dead people! What!? "House of the Dead?" Think it crawling in your dont have guns to shoot em now...What now!? Blood everywhere and horrifying faces are looking at you now...They are calling for you to JOIN em! S***! Was that the last game you played before the accident? Sure doesn't fit in now~

Then as u think its your last breath, the next thing u know you are in this white room, cables all attach to you and a man in white standing before you. You can't see his face, the white lights are just too bright and u can't tell if u are dead or being judged! You try to move but the cables don't permit you, you feel motionless. Then you hear the man call in a deep voice, " ABU BAKAR...This is your final Judgement! " Wait a minute... What Abu Bakar? "That's not my name!"

You wake up and you are in a white room, nice curtains and the smell of fresh flowers. You know u are safe...But are you?! Nightmare after nightmares! You have had flashbacks, you felt the endless pains of the Endless Pit of Fire, you were judged in a white room, although it wasn't your name being called...*Phew*

But what you know now is you've been given a 2nd Chance to live your life. You know you ain't going to end up in the Endless Pit of Fire with those horrifying deadly figures. You want to know who the Man in white is and make sure He gets your Name right the next time you enter the white room.

All you need to do is call this hotline - *J*E*S*U*S and talk immediately after you dial the number.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

How true can a test get?

You Have A Type B+ Personality

You're a pro at going with the flow
You love to kick back and take in everything life has to offer
A total joy to be around, people crave your stability.

While you're totally laid back, you can have bouts of hyperactivity.
Get into a project you love, and you won't stop until it's done
You're passionate - just selective about your passions